| | Arawn's Rank Up thread |  |
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+12Ezrachek Rayone Darkness Kuro Junko Follow the Morrigan Zamoreus DarkMaster Kaoseu Enjel Will Sal Norongachi Bishamon Saitou Arawn 16 posters |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
 |  Subject: Arawn's Rank Up thread  Sat Aug 27, 2011 12:15 am | |
| Character Name: Arawn Dan'Shir Username: Arawn Link to Character Bio: Full profileCurrent Rank: 6 Current Exp: 51/85 EXP Roleplays to be Evaluated: Forced battleFailuresRequested Stat Point Increases:
Last edited by Artemis on Sun Jul 14, 2013 2:09 am; edited 17 times in total (Reason for editing : added exp) | |
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Bishamon Saitou
Number of Posts : 482
Age : 29
Location : Anywhere and everywhere
Job/Interests : stuff, and other stuff...
Quote : Ah swords...natures knives.
Registration Date : 2011-06-03
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Sat Aug 27, 2011 12:29 pm | |
| Can't marked Forced Battle because I'm in it, shame really, you know how much I love to work.
Failures: 6/10
Really good, can't criticise it, sooooo good work, keep it up! | |
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Sal Norongachi
Number of Posts : 903
Age : 38
Location : Scotland
Job/Interests : Philosophical Drunkard/Booze
Quote : Repensum est Canicula
Registration Date : 2009-04-30
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Sat Aug 27, 2011 2:32 pm | |
| You ready? Brace yourselves.
A Forced Battle:
As always mate, you guide the story well, the setting was clear and sharp in my mind from your descriptions. Only one critique i can give and that is that you try and break up your paragraphs more.
So, with that said.
6/10 | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Sun Sep 04, 2011 10:16 pm | |
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Bishamon Saitou
Number of Posts : 482
Age : 29
Location : Anywhere and everywhere
Job/Interests : stuff, and other stuff...
Quote : Ah swords...natures knives.
Registration Date : 2011-06-03
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Wed Sep 14, 2011 1:42 pm | |
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Bishamon Saitou
Number of Posts : 482
Age : 29
Location : Anywhere and everywhere
Job/Interests : stuff, and other stuff...
Quote : Ah swords...natures knives.
Registration Date : 2011-06-03
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Wed Sep 28, 2011 12:25 am | |
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Bishamon Saitou
Number of Posts : 482
Age : 29
Location : Anywhere and everywhere
Job/Interests : stuff, and other stuff...
Quote : Ah swords...natures knives.
Registration Date : 2011-06-03
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Thu Sep 29, 2011 3:48 pm | |
| Wrong place, wrong time: 5/10
Good thread. Funny, perverted and unique. And that's good enough for me, good work.
Swimming: 5/10
Nice solo, an interesting one at that. Just lying chilling in a lake can be an interesting read...who knew? Anywayz as usual great detail, spelling, grammar etc.
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Mon Oct 03, 2011 5:05 pm | |
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Last edited by Arawn on Mon Oct 17, 2011 11:38 pm; edited 1 time in total | |
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Will
Number of Posts : 202
Age : 34
Registration Date : 2010-11-24
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Tue Oct 04, 2011 9:59 pm | |
| Beta Tester 2.0 [6/10]
You did great story wise but you need to make your paragraphs a little easier to read space them out or indent them so as to let your reader know you started a new paragraph. Also when using a NPC you might want to give a brief side note explaining them I talked about this in the cbox with you so I wont cover it again. Finally it would of been nice for a quick recap on how you knew Bish's character...maybe I am too picky but meh...I callz em like I seez em. | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Mon Oct 17, 2011 11:38 pm | |
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Bishamon Saitou
Number of Posts : 482
Age : 29
Location : Anywhere and everywhere
Job/Interests : stuff, and other stuff...
Quote : Ah swords...natures knives.
Registration Date : 2011-06-03
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Thu Oct 20, 2011 10:05 am | |
| Valentine pharmaceuticals: 6/10
A quite enjoyable read for the most part. A bit slow to start, but 'accidentally' knocking people out was amusing, so good work.
Recycling: 5/10
Nice solo. Good length, as always good detail etc. However! I believe it is "Inuit" you politically incorrect fool!
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Sun Jan 22, 2012 1:31 am | |
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Kaoseu Enjel
Number of Posts : 587
Age : 29
Location : In the midst of disaster, dancing upon the scalding remains of this forever burning creation that has been deemed Hell. Care to join me? >:D
Job/Interests : Working on it/ Writing, Drawing, BMX
Quote : Fear is the strength which allows me to live...
Registration Date : 2010-05-15
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Sun Jan 22, 2012 7:56 pm | |
| Distortion: 8/10 Fantastic battle, I enjoyed the back-story, and the flow of things. Would've made a solid ten, but be sure to review your posts before you click that button, several sentences are missing minor words, or some of the grammar is a bit off, but otherwise, well done.
Dragon's Bane: 9/10 Good length for this section, leaves one hanging on. Again, a few grammatical errors, but far less than previous, and excellent storytelling, with the details and the setting. | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Mon Jan 23, 2012 8:47 pm | |
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DarkMaster
Number of Posts : 863
Age : 39
Location : In a daze.
Job/Interests : That's Officer DarkMaster to you, buddy.
Quote : I'm afraid of the dark.
Registration Date : 2010-07-18
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Fri Jan 27, 2012 2:51 pm | |
| Resting gets you killed - 5/10 - I'll grade it since I didn't join until after you left to do battle on your own. BATTLE HOG! Four decent posts and a big dragon-esque hollow.
Night stars and red snow - 7/10 - You took it to easy on the cocky student. But a nice read as always. | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Wed Feb 01, 2012 9:55 pm | |
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Kaoseu Enjel
Number of Posts : 587
Age : 29
Location : In the midst of disaster, dancing upon the scalding remains of this forever burning creation that has been deemed Hell. Care to join me? >:D
Job/Interests : Working on it/ Writing, Drawing, BMX
Quote : Fear is the strength which allows me to live...
Registration Date : 2010-05-15
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Sun Feb 05, 2012 3:37 am | |
| Remnants of Vengeance: 7/10
Wonderful storytelling, as always, and I loved the way you involved units aside from yourself, and told two sides at once, way to balance. Keep lookin' for those missing/extra words, though, VIGILANCE! | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Mon Feb 20, 2012 8:33 pm | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Mon Feb 27, 2012 8:48 pm | |
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Zamoreus
Number of Posts : 139
Age : 32
Registration Date : 2011-05-17
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Tue Feb 28, 2012 1:32 pm | |
| Practice makes permanent: 6xp
Decent length, good sized posts and the kido practice melded well with the thread and as usual, good use of random NPCs.
Taking Inventory: 5/10
Nice introspective solo, not the longest but it was as long as it needed to be for the point to come across. Nice work.
A simple request: 3/10
I probably would have graded it higher had it lasted longer but as it is it's a really short thread despite the good posts on your part.
Edit: Oh and welcome to level 5 | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Mon Apr 30, 2012 8:59 pm | |
| I humbly request the following stats changes:
+2 Fighting Skill
+3 Speed
+4 Spirit
+1 Technique | |
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DarkMaster
Number of Posts : 863
Age : 39
Location : In a daze.
Job/Interests : That's Officer DarkMaster to you, buddy.
Quote : I'm afraid of the dark.
Registration Date : 2010-07-18
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Mon Apr 30, 2012 9:03 pm | |
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Arawn
Number of Posts : 3440
Age : 43
Location : Here, but there
Job/Interests : Anything, but not everything
Quote : You were close, but I was right
Registration Date : 2010-06-23
| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread Tue Jun 05, 2012 12:56 am | |
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| | Subject: Re: Arawn's Rank Up thread | |
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| | Arawn's Rank Up thread | |
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Shame you took it so easy on him.
Great length, great attention to detail, and nice technique you've got your hands on.
